Image showing a reflection of a man in formal attire, with text discussing how to differentiate groom from groomsmen attire for a blog post.

How to Differentiate the Groom from the Groomsmen

Weddings are joyous occasions filled with traditions, customs, and etiquette. Understanding the distinctions between the groom and his groomsmen can add a layer of elegance and sophistication to any celebration. Throughout this article, we'll answer your questions and provide practical tips to help you navigate the intricate realm of wedding etiquette.

Did you know that the average number of groomsmen in a wedding party ranges from three to six? However, there's no hard-and-fast rule, and the groom can choose to have as many or as few groomsmen as he desires. This flexibility allows for personalized experiences and ensures a perfect balance between tradition and individual preferences.

So, whether you're seeking guidance on coordinating outfits, understanding the best man's duties, or simply looking for creative ways to involve the groomsmen, we've got you covered. Let's embark on this enlightening journey through wedding etiquette, where you'll gain the confidence to discern the groom from the groomsmen with finesse and elegance.

What are the responsibilities of the groomsmen?

Groomsmen play an important supporting role in the wedding festivities. Their primary responsibility is to assist the groom in various pre-wedding and on-the-day tasks. This includes attending bachelor party celebrations, helping the groom choose and coordinate attire, and participating in wedding rehearsals. 

On the wedding day, groomsmen ensure the groom's comfort and readiness by being present during the pre-ceremony preparations. They may help with tasks such as tying ties, straightening boutonnieres, and providing emotional support. During the ceremony, groomsmen stand alongside the groom, serving as witnesses to the union and offering their support. They may also assist with practical matters like ushering guests, distributing programs, or managing any last-minute needs that arise. 

Overall, groomsmen are key allies to the groom, helping to create a relaxed and memorable wedding experience.

Are the groom and groomsmen required to wear matching attire?

While there is no strict requirement for the groom and groomsmen to wear matching attire, it is a common tradition that adds a sense of cohesion and visual harmony to the wedding party. Matching attire can create a cohesive aesthetic and highlight the groom's role as the central figure. However, there is flexibility to incorporate individual styles or slight variations within the overall ensemble. 

For example, the groom may choose to wear a distinctive tie or boutonniere, or opt for a different suit color or fabric texture to stand out. It is essential to strike a balance between uniformity and personal expression to ensure the groom and groomsmen complement each other while reflecting their individual personalities.

Ultimately, the decision on matching attire should align with the couple's vision and overall wedding theme.

How many groomsmen should the groom have?

The number of groomsmen a groom should have is a personal decision, and there is no fixed rule. Traditionally, the groom would select between two to six groomsmen, but this can vary based on individual preferences and the size of the wedding party. 

The key is to strike a balance between including close friends or family members while considering factors such as the wedding venue, budget, and overall dynamics of the wedding. 

Ultimately, the groom should choose a number of groomsmen that feels right for him and allows for a meaningful and enjoyable experience for everyone involved. Remember, it's quality over quantity when it comes to selecting groomsmen who will provide support, create lasting memories, and enhance the wedding celebration.

Is it customary for the groom to give gifts to the groomsmen?

Yes, it is customary for the groom to give gifts to his groomsmen as a token of appreciation for their participation and support. Gifting groomsmen is a longstanding tradition that allows the groom to express gratitude for their presence and assistance during the wedding festivities. These gifts serve as reminders of the special role they played on your big day.

The groom has several meaningful ways to show appreciation to his groomsmen:

Personalized Gifts

Consider giving personalized gifts that reflect the interests and personalities of each groomsman. It could be engraved items, accessories, customized clothing, or thoughtful tokens that hold sentimental value.

Groomsmen Experience or Outing

Plan a special outing or experience for your groomsmen, such as a golfing trip, a day at the spa, a sports event, or a memorable activity that you know they will enjoy. This allows you to create lasting memories and bond with your groomsmen outside of the wedding preparations.

Groomsmen Attire

Consider covering or subsidizing the cost of the groomsmen's attire, particularly if you have chosen specific outfits or accessories that align with your wedding vision. This gesture not only shows appreciation but also eases any financial burden on your groomsmen.

Toast or Speech

During the wedding reception, publicly acknowledge and express your appreciation for your groomsmen in a heartfelt toast or speech. Share anecdotes, memories, and the significance of their presence in your life. This public acknowledgment will make them feel honored and valued.

Personalized Watches

A timeless gift, a personalized watch can be engraved with the recipient's name, the wedding date, or a meaningful message.

Outdoor Gear

If your groomsmen are adventure enthusiasts, consider gifting items like personalized camping gear, multitools, or durable backpacks.

Sports or Hobby-Related Items

Tailor the gifts to their interests, such as team merchandise, golf accessories, fishing gear, or items related to their hobbies.

Remember, the best gifts are those that reflect the individual tastes and preferences of your groomsmen. By considering their personalities and interests, you can choose gifts that they will truly appreciate and treasure.

Can the groomsmen wear different colored suits?

Yes, the groomsmen can wear different colored suits, depending on the couple's preferences and wedding theme. While coordinating attire can create a cohesive look, incorporating different suit colors or shades for groomsmen is an increasingly popular trend. It adds visual interest and allows each groomsman to express their individual style. 

When opting for different colored suits, it is advisable to maintain a cohesive overall aesthetic by selecting complementary shades or sticking to a color palette. This can be achieved by incorporating similar accessories or elements that tie the looks together, such as matching ties, pocket squares, or boutonnieres. Discussing the desired attire with the groomsmen in advance ensures everyone is on the same page and creates a harmonious and stylish wedding party.

What are some common groom and groomsmen attire mistakes?

While it's important to look sharp and stylish, there are a few common attire mistakes that grooms and groomsmen should avoid:

Poor Fit

Ill-fitting suits or tuxedos can negatively impact the overall look. Whether it's too tight or too loose, a proper fit is essential. Tailoring the attire to each individual's measurements ensures a polished and well-put-together appearance.

Mismatched Styles 

In an attempt to be unique, some groomsmen may choose different styles of suits or tuxedos that clash with one another or the groom's attire. It's crucial to maintain a cohesive look while allowing for subtle variations.

Inappropriate Shoes or Accessories

Wearing the wrong shoes or accessories can detract from the overall aesthetic. Opt for dress shoes that complement the suit color and style. Additionally, ensure that accessories such as belts, ties, or pocket squares coordinate harmoniously with the overall outfit.

Neglecting Grooming

Pay attention to grooming details such as neat haircuts, clean-shaven faces, and well-maintained nails. These small details contribute to a polished and well-groomed appearance.

Forgetting to Remove Labels or Tags

It's easy to overlook removing labels or tags from new suits or tuxedos. Always double-check and remove any visible tags before the wedding day.

What are some alternative roles for the groomsmen?

While the traditional role of groomsmen is to support the groom and assist with various wedding-related tasks, there are alternative roles that can be assigned based on individual circumstances and preferences. Here are some alternative roles for groomsmen to consider:

Master of Ceremonies

A groomsman can take on the role of being the master of ceremonies, guiding guests through the different segments of the reception, announcing speeches, toasts, and other important moments.

Music or Entertainment Coordinator

A groomsman with a knack for music or entertainment can help curate playlists, coordinate with the DJ or band, and ensure a smooth flow of music and entertainment throughout the reception.

Wedding Day Coordinator

A responsible groomsman can take on the role of a wedding day coordinator, assisting with logistics, coordinating with vendors, and ensuring that everything runs smoothly behind the scenes.

Social Media Manager

In today's digital age, a groomsman can be assigned the role of capturing and managing social media content during the wedding. They can help create a designated hashtag, encourage guests to share their photos, and curate social media updates.

DIY or Decor Expert

If a groomsman has a flair for DIY projects or is particularly skilled in decor, they can contribute by helping with crafting, setting up decorations, or providing creative input for the overall aesthetic of the wedding.

Are there any specific responsibilities for the best man?

Yes, the best man holds specific responsibilities that are key to the wedding celebration. Here are some of the main duties typically assigned to the best man:

Support the Groom

The best man acts as the groom's right-hand and provides emotional support throughout the wedding planning process. They are there to listen, offer advice, and help alleviate any pre-wedding jitters.

Organize the Bachelor Party

It is the best man's responsibility to plan and coordinate the bachelor party, a memorable celebration for the groom and his friends. This includes selecting a suitable location, organizing activities, and ensuring a fun and enjoyable experience.

Assist with Wedding Preparations

The best man assists the groom with various pre-wedding tasks, such as attending suit fittings, coordinating with other groomsmen, and helping with any last-minute preparations.

Hold the Rings

One of the most symbolic roles of the best man is to hold the wedding rings during the ceremony and present them when the time comes for the exchange of vows.

Give a Toast or Speech

The best man traditionally delivers a toast or speech during the wedding reception. This speech is an opportunity to share heartfelt stories, offer well-wishes, and express gratitude to the couple, their families, and guests.

Coordinate Groomsmen

The best man takes the lead in coordinating the groomsmen, ensuring they are informed about their responsibilities, properly dressed, and punctual for the various wedding events.

How can the groom and groomsmen coordinate their outfits?

Coordinating outfits between the groom and groomsmen can create a cohesive and visually appealing wedding party. Here are some tips to help achieve a coordinated look:

Discuss the vision. Start by having a conversation with the groomsmen and the groom about the desired overall style and color scheme. Consider the wedding theme, venue, and the couple's preferences when deciding on the outfits.

Suit or Tuxedo Style

Decide on a specific suit or tuxedo style that will be worn by all members of the wedding party. This could include details such as lapel style, jacket length, or number of buttons.

Color Palette

Choose a color palette or specific shades that complement the wedding theme. Opt for colors that flatter different skin tones and align with the couple's vision. Consider factors such as the season, venue, and time of the wedding when selecting colors.

Consistent Accessories

Coordinate accessories such as ties, bowties, pocket squares, and belts. These small details can tie the looks together and create a harmonious visual effect.

Personalized Touches

Allow for individual expression within the coordinated look. For example, the groom can wear a slightly different suit color or style to stand out while maintaining a cohesive aesthetic with the groomsmen.

Fitting and Measurements

Ensure that all members of the wedding party are properly measured and fitted for their attire. Proper tailoring ensures a polished and cohesive appearance.

Communication and Timelines

Keep open lines of communication with the groomsmen to ensure everyone understands the outfit requirements and timeline. Provide clear instructions and allow sufficient time for any necessary alterations or adjustments.

By coordinating outfits, the groom and groomsmen can create a unified visual presentation that enhances the overall aesthetic of the wedding party.

Should the groom and groomsmen wear boutonnieres?

Wearing boutonnieres is a common tradition for both the groom and groomsmen. Here are some considerations regarding boutonnieres:

Symbolic Significance

Boutonnieres, typically a single flower or a small floral arrangement worn on the lapel of a suit or tuxedo, hold symbolic significance. They are a visual representation of the wedding celebration and can be seen as a distinguishing accessory for the groom and groomsmen.

Coordinated Design

Coordinate the design of the boutonnieres to match the overall floral arrangements and color scheme of the wedding. Ensure that the groom's boutonniere stands out slightly to distinguish him from the groomsmen.

Personal Touch

Consider incorporating individual preferences or meaningful elements into the boutonnieres. This could include specific flowers, colors, or small details that hold significance for the groom and groomsmen.


Ensure that the boutonnieres are securely attached to the lapel to prevent any accidental detachment during the wedding festivities. Consider using magnetic or pin fasteners to keep them in place comfortably.

Floral Allergies

Be mindful of any potential allergies or sensitivities among the wedding party when selecting the flowers for the boutonnieres. Opt for hypoallergenic flowers or alternatives if necessary.

Ultimately, the decision to wear boutonnieres is a personal one. They add a touch of elegance and tradition to the wedding attire, and when coordinated properly, they can enhance the overall aesthetic of the groom and groomsmen's outfits.

Can the groomsmen be responsible for wedding favors?

Yes, the groomsmen can certainly take on the responsibility of managing wedding favors. Here's how they can handle this task:


Work closely with the groom to determine the type and design of wedding favors. Ensure that the chosen favors align with the couple's preferences and the overall theme of the wedding.


Take charge of procuring the necessary materials for the wedding favors. This could involve purchasing or ordering items, ensuring they are delivered on time and in the desired quantity.


Organize a designated space where the groomsmen can assemble the wedding favors. Allocate specific roles and responsibilities to each groomsman to streamline the process and ensure efficiency.


If the wedding favors require personalization, such as adding tags or labels, coordinate with the groom to ensure that all necessary details are included. Pay attention to accuracy and consistency in personalization.


On the wedding day, the groomsmen can take charge of distributing the wedding favors to the guests. Ensure that they are displayed attractively and accessible to guests during appropriate moments, such as at the reception or as part of the place settings.

By entrusting the groomsmen with the responsibility of wedding favors, it lightens the workload for the couple and allows the groomsmen to actively contribute to the wedding preparations. Effective coordination, attention to detail, and teamwork are key to ensuring a successful and enjoyable distribution of wedding favors.